feeling high............................

I GAVE UP MY INHIBTIONS
SINCE THEY WERE PULLING ME BACK
IN FRONT WAS THE SKY
DARK AND BLACK

SUN WAS GONE TO FARTHEST CORNER
IWAS LOST IN THE VEIW ITSELF
NOTHING WAS THERE TO
KEEP ME ON MY TRACK

BUT I REALISED THAT I CAN'T GO BACK
FARWARD IS THE WAY
BACK AND BLACK WILL MAKE ME PREY
AND I KEPT MOVING MOVING AHEAD

ACROSS THE OCEANS
ABOVE VALLEY OF THE DEAD
NOTHING AS STILL CLEAR TO ME
EXCEPT MY INSTINCT AND MY ZEAL

BUT I JST KEPT MOVING SOMEHOW
SPIRIT IN ME BURNING BRIGHT
HIGHER THE DARKNESS HARDER THE FIGHT
I WAS FIGHTING WITH MYSELF
HELPLESS I WAS TO KILL MYSELF
BUT THE MURDER WAS GOOD
IT WAS LIKE HOLY
FREEING MYSELF FROM MY OLD PATHETIC STORY

STORY WHERE I WAS FEELING DOWN
STORY WHERE I MESSED AROUND
NOW I M FEELING THE LIGHTNESS INSIDE
INTINCT IS ON AND INHIBTIONS BESIDE

LOST AND FOUND

I found my self after a long time
i was dejected and depressed for something it seemed
aimless like a horse running so far
far in darkness of vivid thoughts
i was shivering under a peepal tree
and it was snowing hard
i was thinking about the past
what i got and what i lost
sweet memories and mate atlast
crying and seeing diomaond od my eyes
rubies of my wounds shinning bright
then i saw a fimiliar figure
who came to me and me walk
i knew him he was my own self whom i lost
he was happy to see me alive
he cleaned my wounds,kissed my eyes
gave me hopes and dreams to wear
now i was able to recognize me
my self was there to rejoice me
but still i wasn't breathing well
something was choking like hell
i wasn't able to feel the air
then he gave me a joint to puff
the puff of passion made me tough
now i realised my passion was gone
when diamonds and rubies were shinning bright in snowy dawn
puff of passion led me back to life
and that's how my self made me realize
passion is what that can keep me alive
i need more pufffs of passion to live
i hav many things to leave and to give
the memories,the love,the beauty and romance
the wind,the song,the moonlight and that dance
i want to give it back to her she deserved it more than me
i was the one burried for all the wrong reasons
but since now the memories are fading like the evening sun
i have stopped my wild run because i m ready with my puffs, to face it all
no depression no ropes and no ceiling,
my heart has lost feeling
so i m still healing
my self has taken a good care of me
and now i m letting my heart go free
from shakles of memory,from shakles of desires
to fly higher and to be on fire
back to life i m living it well
u want to live more when u hav seen hell
so bid luck to me bid me good bye
my self has taken me to another high
again being a jogi
anain being unsocial
again taking my joint
again leaving the bloody bottle
subtle intinct and fatal desires
indulgence,obssesion,sex,love and fires
now i m jst making myself happy
becoz it has always been bad for me
when i thought for others
so now just me myself passion and my colours
colours of my life that faded away
are again going to shine bright
the pictures of u will now surely hide
the pictures of u will now surely hide....................................

is this my redemption
i can't say
but yes this is a new beginning
from where,we went to end everything.................................................
yes now sping hav come
the winter is gone
no more diamonds no rubies on along
now there will be only tears and blood
new flowers,new leaves,new fragnance
new love...........................................................................

I long to speak the deepest words I have to say to you;
but I dare not, for fear you should laugh.
That is why I laugh at myself and shatter my secret in jest.
I make light of my pain, afraid you should do so.
I long to tell you the truest words I have to say to you;
but I dare not, being afraid that you would not believe them.
That is why I disguise them in untruth, saying the contrary of what I mean.
I make my pain appear absurd, afraid that you should do so.
I long to use the most precious words I have for you;
but I dare not, fearing I should not be paid with like value.
That is why I gave you hard names and boast of my callous strength.
I hurt you, for fear you should never know any pain.
I long to sit silent by you; but I dare not lest my heart come
out at my lips.
That is why I prattle and chatter lightly and hide my heart
behind words.
I rudely handle my pain, for fear you should do so.
I long to go away from your side;
but I dare not, for fear my cowardice should become known to you.
That is why I hold my head high and carelessly come into your presence.
Constant thrusts from your eyes keep my pain fresh for ever.

again a masterpiece from the gardner by tagore

i feel the flow of river in the poetry of tagore

very enchanting and infectious

Hands cling to hands and eyes linger on eyes，
thus begins the record of our hearts.
It is the moonlight night of March;
the sweet smell of henna is in the air;
my flute lies on the earth neglectedand your garland of flowers is unfinished.

This love between you and me is simple as a song.
Your veil of the saffron colour makes my eyes drunk.
The jasmine wreath that you wove me thrills to my heart like praise.
It is a game of giving and withholding,
revealing and screening again;
some smiles and some little shyness,
and some sweet useless struggles.

This love between you and me is simple as a song.
No mystery beyond the present;
no striving for the impossible;
no shadow behind the charm;no groping in the depth of the dark.
This love between you and me is simple as a song.
We do not stray out of all words into the ever silent;
we do not raise our hands to the void for things beyond hope.
IT IS ENOUGH WHAT WE GIVE AND WHAT WE GET
we av not crushed joy to the utmost to wring from it the wine of pain

this love between and me is siple as a song......................


from the gardner by tagore "the ultimate master"

drugs for life "part-1"

no this is not a dish it a system of taking ganja,marijuana,in in sucha dense form that one shot is enough to sleep.marijuana is not something bad it is something that is embeded in our culture jst as mango and banaana it is a magic fruit,god's were mad about it so were jogis

and still people hav it with equal poise and respect.

yaar i m not writting this because i m aganjedi but yes bong it is asimple thermodynamic system invented by the ganjedis of iit-kharagpur.

it is simple u hav to hav a bottle cut at the bottom.place it in abucket such that there is vacum in bottle the some how pierce a hole in the cap so that a cheelum fixes airtightly in the mouth ob bottom cut bottle,so since there is a vacume in bottle so the fumes of cheelum goes down and condenses such that a dense milky fume is produced and then it is taken in and u get the plesure

the best thing about ganja is that unlike alcohol,in doesn't make u angry,or irritated,it makes u cool,and the best example r the jogis with cheelum.it sends u in trance.and u can enjoy the music going around the magic is such that u will not feel irritated on anything.

ganja is the best thing to increase the concentration.it makes u a monk as lord shiva calm poise and magnificient.and i m not joking.its all practical no theory at all.u hav to try it to believe it that yes it happens.

till 1991 ganja was a legal drug,and according to scientist gamja is not as harmful as ciggeratte beedis it is jst thta is makes u addicted to itself more then beedis and ciggerettes.max consumption of ganja is in bengal and in metros in kolkata than in banglore.iit is not a drug it is a tranquilizer.to make people happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i have a frnd u was addicted to mrphine the same thing doctors usse to make u sleep .choroform ka chota bhai

so doctor told him to hav cigerette so that he can leave morphine,and then he got ganja the super drug

well there r many other things to that make a good "halucination" including the snakebite addict but we will talk about them some day later

and since now exam r coming ganja is on an we hav make it good this time to...............

so drug classification will be continued in the next meeting

till then

"jai ho"

BACK TO THE PATH

THAT I LOST IN LIGHT

THE LIGHT OF HAPPINESS

THAT ELUDED ME FROM LIFE

THE LIGHT THAT MADE

STARS OF REALITY DISSAPPEAR

BUT NOW SINCE I FELL

WHEN I STRUCK WITH A DARK STONE

THAT WAS POPPING ON PATH OF ILLUSION

TO TEACH ME A LESSON

THAT THIS IS NOT MY PATH

WHAT I LOST,WHAT I DISCARD

WHAT I THOUGHT TO BE COMPLEX

WAS MY PATH,BUT NOW THE JOLT

HAS BROKEN MY SLUMBER

AND NOW THE BRIGTHNESS

SEEMS TO BE ILLUSION

THAE DARKNESS IN ME HAS TAKEN ITS PLACE

NOW THE I HAV TORN THE ILLUSIVE LACE

I DONT WANT THE FLICKERING FLAMES

THE DARKNESS INSIDE ME KEEPS ME ALIVE

ROTTEN STEM BUT MY ROOTS ARE SUBLIME

I M AGAIN BURNING IN MY DARKNESS

THE LIGHTS R NOW NOT TOUCHING ME

THEY HAV LEFT ME FOR ,MY OWN GOOD.

NOW I HAVE STOPED TO MAKE NEW MOODS

ONLY ONE MOOD IS NOW MINE

ONLY ONE THING IS FOR WHAT I M BLIND

WHEN U R BLIND U SEE MORE

WHEN U R BLIND U SEE WHAT IS SURE

BECAUSE THEN ALL OTHER THINGS ARE DARK

THE DARK OCEANS AND U AND THE SHARK

I HOPE NOW ALL WIL BE ALRIGHT

THE DARKNESS WILL NEVER LET ME CONFUSE

THE DARKNESS WILL SHOW ME THE PATH

THE PATH THAT IS MINE

THE PATH THAT IS TRUE

FOR I WILL THERE NEVER FOR U

I WANT TO LIVE NOW FOR MYSELF

JST SOME YEARS MORE ,TO GO WITH UR GRACE

NOW I M BACK TO MY SUPREME DARKNESS

NOW I M BACK TO MY OLD MONTAGE

I M FEELING THE DARK WINDS

I M FEELING MY NEW DARK WINGS

READY TO FLY IN THIS BRIGHT SKY

READY TO FELL THE ILLUSIVE LIGHT

BUT THIS TIME I WILL NOT FALL

BUT THIS TIME DARKNESS WILL BE ALL

ALL AROUND ME,TO PROTECT ME

IT WILL BE AT MY SIDE

SO DON'T GIVE ME YOUR FLICKERING FLAME

BECAUSE THE DARKNESS INSIDE ME KEEPS ME ALIVE....................................

IT HAS BEEN TOO MUCH OF SHIT AND WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THAT

I M THE CULPRIT

AND I MEAN IT THIS TIME

WE NEEDED A JOLT BECAUSE DUE TO ALL THIS EASY SAILLING EXPERIENCE

WE BECAME LAZY AND CHAMPU

BUT NOW SINCE SOME THING HAS HAPPPENED THAT WAS WORTH HAPPENING NOW I FEEL THAT YES THERE IS SOMETHING TO FIGHT FOR,I WAS GETTING BORED OF THIS EASY SAILING,NO WAVES NO CURRRENT ,JUST GOING LIKE A DEAD BODY FLOWING ON WATER NOW I THINK,WE WILL SWIM BETTTER AGAINST THE CURRENT

I M FEELING LKE SAMRAT RATAN OF "KEEP OF THE GRASS" WHERE I HAVE CONSTRUCTED MY DOWNFALL.WELL SO THAT A BETTER LADDER CAN BE MADE ,I WANTED A SENSE A URGENCY THAT WAS SURELY NOT COMING WAY,BUT BECAUSE OF THIS I THINK IT WILLL SURELY COME!!!!!!!!

ISN'T IT GREAT MAKING YOURSELF FEEL THE PAIN TO BE HAPPY

JST LIKE THE VEDIC JOGIS,AND I M SURE THAT IF THIS DIDN'T HAPPEN THAN I WOULD HAVE BEEN DOING THE SAME NAUTANKI THAT I HAVE BEEN DOING FROM THE LAST THREE SEMS,I NEEDED A JOLT A LIGHTINING JOLT AND I GOT IT.

SO WELCOME TO THE NEW LIFE.

SOMETHING LIKE I RAN FROM THE B.TECH AND THEY MADE ME,TO DO DIFERENT THINGS LIKE SOME THING LIKE "LAKSHYA",YAAR THE STORY HAD SOMETHING IN IT A VERY VIBRANT STORY OF OF A MESSSY CHARACTER LIKE ME,SWEETLY SPOILED,BY ALL KIND OF THINGS NEVER TOOK ANYTHING SERIOUSLY ALWAYS IN A FUN MOOD TILL MANY THINGS GET OUT OF HIS RACH INCLUDING LOVE,SELF RESPECT,CONFIDENCE AND AND ABOVE ALL HIMSELF,AND THE FILM WAS THE JOURNEY OF FINDING HIMSELF,AND WHERE HE FOUND HIMSELF AT 8000M ABOVE SEALEVEL IN THE HIMALAYAS,COOOOOOOOOOOOOOL NAA.

NOT FOR ME ,FOR ME WHAT WAS COOL WAS THE COURAGE THAT WAS STILL LEFT IN HIM ATER LOSING ALL TO THE LAZZINESS AND TAKEN FOR GRANTED ATTITUDE THAT WAS THE REAL HIM,THE REAL KARAN SHERGILL.

AND BETTER WAS HIS ATTITUDE TOWARDS HIS MISTAKES AND THE BEST THING

YES HE FINALLY CAME TO KNOW THAT HE AN MAKE DECISION TOOO

REMEBER "har faisla tm nahi karogi romi" THAT WAS REALLY SOMETHING COOL YAAR ATLAST HE GOT SOME BRAINS IN HIM

THAT I HAV GOT NOW ,ALL I HAV DO NOW IS TO COMPLETE THIS DAMN COURSE AND GO FROM HERE AS EARLY AS POSSIBE I KNOW THAT IT WILL STILL TAKE TWO AND A HALF YEARS ANYHOW.........................

YES THIS WAS IMPORTANT THAT I SHUOLD BE SCREWED AND IT HAS BEEN DONE EFFICIENTLY

AND NOW WE HAV TO BE AGAIN IN FORM

BUT YES STILL NO PAIN JST A LITTLE SENSE OF URGENCY HAS CREPT IN SOMEHOW LUCKLY.

IT HAS BEEN TWO YEARS SINCE WE HAV BEEN REALLY PASSIONATE ABOUT ANYTHING,NOT EVEN GIRLS BECAUSE IF I WOULD HAVE BEEN PASSIONATE,WHY WOULD I HAV EXPERIMENTED SO MUCH?

SO ANYHOW FEELING GOOD TO BE SCRWED BUT HOW MUCH THIS I HAV TO SEE BECAUSE THIS WILL BE ENOUGH OR ME TRUELY.....................................

I M SOMEHOW GAINING THE LOST CONFIDENCE BECAUSE OF THIS DOWNFALL OF DEBACLE AS I AM GAINING THE KILLER INSTINCT THAT HAS BEEN LOST ONE YEAR BEFORE.

AND REMEMBERING THE LINES OF ONE OF MY FAVOURITE POEM

HOLD FAST TO DREAMS SO THAT

THE DREAMS CAN'T DIE

LIFE IS A BROKEN WINGED BIRD

THAT CAN'T FLY.........

SO DREAMS HAV WOKE UP FROM THE THREE SEM LONG SLUMBER ATLAST.

AND SO KARAN SHERGILL BACK TO THE ACADEMY

TO COMLETE THE COURSE..........................